Personal Power e-zine, August 25, 2008

A Step-by-Step Guide to Being "Hopelessly Human"

Do you enjoy “people watching”? Today as you bustle down a busy street or grab a quick lunch in a restaurant, take a good look at your fellow humans. Include yourself, too!

Notice all the effort we expend in our clothing, our bodily postures, our hair and makeup, our cell-phone calls. How hard we all try to “get it right,” to “make it happen” or simply to survive with some measure of dignity.

It’s no wonder so many of us feel tired and old beyond our years! All the pressure we put on ourselves in a single day soon adds up to weeks and years.

I remember when I was only in my twenties noticing how tense my shoulders felt and how haggard I looked when I glanced at my reflection in a nearby window. I was sitting on a bench, cramming down a snack between college classes, hoping I would make the late shuttle on time to grab my four-year-old daughter before her daycare closed.

Was my life so stressful “because” I was in college full time, with a young child and a mediocre marriage? Was it “because” I slept, at most, four hours a night in order to keep up with my family, work and household duties while striving to remain on the dean’s list?

I remember thinking, that day, “What’s wrong with me? I should be happy! I’m doing everything right. Why am I so uptight?”

Then I saw something perfectly wonderful and wholly out of synch with my own inner state

A group of four laughing students walked past me and flopped on the grass. They rolled around, tossing their limbs this way and that, not caring what they looked like or what anyone thought. Their notebooks and pens were all over the place, but they didn’t seem to care. They were in “decompression” mode and they were reveling in it.

Something very important was being shown to me in that instant and I’m grateful to say… I got it!

Those four students were merely “being human.” They certainly did not take themselves as seriously as I did. Suddenly I could see how my tension must be repelling my desires instead of drawing them to me. I saw that I was missing the juice of life as I chugged away, day after day, in mental survival mode. What a revelation!

In my quest to please and serve others, get it right and prove that “I’m a winner,” I had lost the relaxed acceptance of my humanity I had once held in ample measure. I had been focusing so hard on trying to control my life that I had not taken the time to love and accept the unique flavors inside that made me the one and only “ME.”

Years later I find myself called to share with you the power of being in “no mind.” Yet in this quest to restore your personal power, I urge you to never forget the mega-importance of accepting and loving your raw humanity.

Being human means sometimes letting yourself off the hook, dropping the self-editing and being a total goofball! Just in case you have forgotten how to do it, here are a few tips...

The Step-By-Step Guide to Being Hopelessly Human

Several times a day, relax. Settle into your body. Take a deep breath and just notice what IS. Step out of time. Be present, with no agenda. Be grateful for it all.
Stop trying to appear perfect. Be open about your imperfections. That’s right -- be confident enough to advertise your imperfections, not as “what’s wrong” with you but as your gorgeous, unique humanity.
Accept yourself both for what you are and what you are not…yet. Remember to be patient. Everything is temporary and you will always learn and improve. You’ll never be “finished” per say, but you will become complete in an increasing number of areas and you will move forward to new realms. Keep your standards high but not impossible.
Embrace and relish the thoroughly original way you go about life. Grant yourself total freedom to be the unique you, promising only to do no intentional harm to others.
Laugh at yourself and all the amazingly embarrassing, silly, immature, crazy, bizarre things you do, think and say! We’re all a work in progress – join the crowd!
Liberate yourself by letting go of any judgment you may have towards yourself or others, especially in regards to apparent maturity level or “social appropriateness.” In short….Lighten up!
Accept and love yourself by seeing how adorable you are. Allow yourself the breathing room you require to develop properly. Give yourself the space to make mistakes.
Switch the tone of your inner dialogue to one of loving self-acceptance. No self-putdowns, guilt or blame. If you do something you’re sorry for, spend your energy getting the lesson, improving and moving forward, not beating yourself up.
Describe your behavior to others without identifying it as “YOU.” Behavior is just behavior. The more detached you are, the funnier it is! “I tripped on my own feet on the way in…that wasn’t very sexy now, was it?”
Let the adult (the “mature” part of you) describe the child (the goofball part) in a lighthearted way. Leave out the cynicism or sarcasm. Replace it with delighted humor.

When you decide how you feel about you, others will feel that way, too!

Life is play. It is a dance, a song, a game, but most of all it is an experience. In the end you can’t get it wrong…you can only get it. So relax – you’re doing great! Remember to enjoy the journey. You have no idea how long it will last, so play full out!

About the Author

Personal power expert Michelle Rigg is the author of You Must Be OUT of YOUR MIND: A Step-by-Step Guide to Creating More Power In Your Life. Her clients usually see remarkable improvements in income, relationships, communication, focus, and clarity after completing just one workshop or telephone laser session. For a FREE 5-step course that will supercharge your personal power, visit http://www.createpersonalpower.com.

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